No puking allowed

Hospital Hill Run, Kansas City, MO
June 4, 2011

This was half-marathon #38, and it may well have been the most difficult. Not due to lack of training, not because of the notoriously hilly course, not because of illness: not for any of the usual reasons.

It was hot and humid. Really hot. Really humid. For maybe the second day this spring, so very few of the 7000-or so participants had acclimated yet. Normally by this time it's been warm enough to be uncomfortable and to get the body used to some warmer runs. Not this year. I was far more concerned about the heat than about the hills, and it turned out my concern was well-founded. The hills really weren't unreasonable. There was one that was ridiculous, but it was very very short. The rest would have been quite do-able on a normal day.

This wasn't a normal day for most of us. It was 81 degrees when we parked the car at 6am. No clouds were to be seen, promising a very quick warmup. It was also quite humid, but it took me awhile to figure that out. I only realized it around mile 5, when it occurred to me that all the water I had poured over myself (in an attempt to cool down) was not evaporating. Shirt and shorts stayed soaking wet and dripping for the entire time we were outside.

Somewhere between miles 2 and 3, I think there was a collective decision to throw out any time expectations, and simply hope to finish without cramping, puking, or passing out. Everyone I spoke to, and there were quite a few since we were all walking anyway, had given up on achieving any particular time goal. It was clearly going to be a 13.1-mile sufferfest, so everyone hunkered down and kept moving forward, at any pace. Several wonderful people along the course brought out sprinklers and set them up in the street. Two more angels at miles 7-ish and 11-ish brought out tubs of ice for us to grab and put under our hats. Those people were genuinely appreciated. The ridiculous-but-short hill was, of course, at mile 12. There was a construction project at the top, and one of the construction workers was standing on the fourth floor with a hose, spraying us as we trudged by. He was wonderful!

I walked for a while with very nice guy named Eric, who was running to honor his brother who was two years' clean from various addictions. He wanted to show his brother that it was possible to make a major life change -- he'd only been running since his brother got clean. He had actually run this course several times in cooler weather, but the heat was more than he could handle, and he'd given up on making his time goal. I think he felt better when I told him that I was usually two miles further down the road at this point (mile 10 or so). I finally was able to attempt to jog some more after about half a mile, so said goodbye and went on my way.

I was able to trot the last few tenths of a mile to the finish, but after crossing the finish line I immediately had to find some shade and sit down before gravity pulled me down. This was the closest I have come to thinking I might actually pass out. It took about 10 minutes of sitting in the shade to cool down enough to feel like standing up again. Our little group of five gradually found each other and agreed that this one was no fun. We all expected hard, but even in the hardest races there is a sort of perverse pleasure in simply doing the distance. Not today. I seriously doubt I will be interested in attempting this one again, even though I would like to try the hills in cooler weather. Water stops were every 1.5 miles; in weather like this every mile might have helped. I took Gatorade and water at every stop, and took some electrolyte capsules a couple of times.

After a quick shower I was dropped at the airport. I ran into another group who did the same race, and they also felt the same way. No fun, just happy to finish without getting sick. But it was a heck of a training session! The hardest 2:43 and medal I have ever earned. I seriously doubt I will want the race pictures though...